Rentals

One of the more interesting aspects of traveling frequently on business is that I never know what vehicle I’m going to get. I like to specify an SUV in case I end up coming home with a stack of VCR’s, and of course, it helps when you're hauling various test equipment for the actual job at hand.

But the SUV category is pretty broad, from compact to crossover. My favorite model was the Jeep Liberty. The controls were simple but effective. The radio had a vacuum fluorescent display (in the Chrysler style) with easy to use knobs and buttons. The cruise adjustments were right where you’d want them, and the displays were easy to read without being overly simplistic. The ride, brakes, and drivetrain earned top points in my book. Sadly, these models are being phased out (they weren’t so hot on gas mileage, either).

I’ve had the displeasure of driving the Nissan Versa. The surprisingly nice Chevy Traverse. The Equinox, which does not rate very high in my book, and even a couple of Fords.

And I will say this. Anyone that thinks that the Japanese make a superior vehicle today, based on the crossover and SUV market, has their head in the sand. Ford and GM have made such major leaps in recent years that it’s almost unbelievable. Meanwhile, Toyota has taken their share of punches, and they haven’t fared well. All of that aside, let me tell you about the biggest piece of shit I have driven to date. The Toyota Rav4.

Where do I begin with this SUV? Toyota is known for building some of the best ‘appliance’ cars on the road. Ones that are pure vanilla and blend in. You put gas in and they go. No muss, no fuss, no fun. Which is just what a lot of people are looking for. Sadly, this car fails on the very essence of that fundamental.

If you’ve ever driven a 90’s Tercel, this car is a lot like that. It accelerates like nobody’s business, probably because it feels so damn light. But the issue is, it’s either going, or it’s not. Touch the throttle lightly and the engine responds with plenty of power, along with a symphony of coffee cans banging together through a gearbox that sounds like it came from a ’49 Farmall.

Mass is rather...lacking...in the door. Additional force is required if you want to actually close it. Additionally, I found that dew and condensation drip directly into the drivers power window switch in a way that's almost planned.

The brakes respond in kind, meaning there’s no modulation, whatsoever. The problem here is that you delay in braking because you want to avoid whiplash, however this means that in big city driving, you’re always braking late, and the 30 cars behind you that would like some notice of your stopping, are probably cursing under their breath as they avoid smashing into the back of you.

And speaking of smashing into the back of you, while I cannot fully explain the root cause, I have narrowly avoided two rear end collisions as this car has attempted to accelerate while I was trying to slow it. Once at a stop light when I was just about stopped and the engine decided to tach up to 4000 RPM’s and began to pull forward. Yes, there was a car in front of me and if the light hadn’t turned green I’d be in a lot of trouble right now. 

"Like a Rock"....the steering wheel, not the car.

So let’s talk about steering. Whoever designed this interior should have been given more than a $30 budget. The steering wheel is like a Playskool toy. Extremely hard, cheap plastic. No variable resistance in the turning. The gauges are bright and clear, except for the Temp gauge which, in the darkness, resembles a floating red toothpick because A: There is no lighted origin of the pointer, and B: Some fool left all graduations off of the gauge! How useful!

HCFE!

Also, somewhere a Ukranian tractor is missing its radio.

You would think such a large display would spend less time displaying "No Message". For that matter, this message is present for any station not transmitting RDS info, which are quite a few. And let's not get started about the reception.

The seats were handcrafted by the Amish from the densest oak they could find, and then covered by the finest polyster Toyota could specify. A mere 4 hour ride has you wishing for a red vinyl bench seat from an old Thomas schoolbus. At least then you stand the chance of getting bounced out the window and escaping this interior. 

I spent a lot of time studying the dashboard to find out what gear I was in. Shifting out of Park blindly was not advised. The shift gate has the accuracy of a keelboat adrift in the Indian Ocean.

So…the brakes have no give, the ride is un-appreciably rough, the engine extremely unrefined, the seats are hard, and the gear shifter has plenty of unnecessary lateral movements required to get to D.

You will forever be guessing which options you were too cheap to order.

At least the carpet is absorbent.